PiratePalooza Pirate updates, pirate news and pirate stories from the world of PiratePalooza.

As a right amount of furious clamor from prior postings have determined: most of you Earth lubbers seem well abashed of the art of Captain Drew’s pirate planet, namely Poop Poetry. As such, I shall be hiding the bulk of my latest treasure beneath the cut. So, if you be not sure that you’ve an ear for the high art of the space pirates, take in just a sample of this latest masterpiece. If you love it, click on through for the rest. Me? I be flush with success.

The Little Brown What Would Not Flush
a pram by Captain Drew

I have a poop which will not flush
no matter what I do

It peers at me from ‘neath the ledge
whatever shall I do?

I flush
it goes

I turn around
it pops back Continue Reading

Many of me reader believe your old pal Captain Drew to be only concerned with technical innovations (like the rPhone™) or flirting with biologically accommodating lassies (like, um… what’s your number?). But I submit this to you: Only a few moments ago, I completed a little pooem what might entice those budding minstrels amongst you to craft some toe-tapping, boot-slapping accompaniment fit for the outhouse privy. Just mind where you tap your toes. Please be so kind to attribute this work of literature to yours truly should you decide to scratch it into the planks above your own ship’s honeypot. (Note: this pram may not be suitable for lubbers what have never been poetically inspired whilst in the head, or lassies what wish to think of Captain Drew as having the ability to think above the level of a 14 year old boy)

A festive swirl
of brown and green
around the bowl
and back again Continue Reading