Last weekend Captain Drew traveled down to Tybee Island, Georgia, to observe the League of the Black Flag in action at the 5th Annual Tybee Island Pirate Fest… not to brag but PiratePalooza enjoyed its 5th Annual festival well before those silly beach folk! ;P

Black Flagger Israel Hand discovered that the Tybee Beach Police do not allow sleeping in the sand…. why not learn along with him?

BREAKING NEWS – Today Captain Drew announced in a press conference at PiratePalooza’s corporate headquarters that he will be teaming with the internet giant Google in a effort to increase awareness of Google’s newest service “Google Voice” and to spur adoption of Captain Drew’s steam-powered rPhone™. Visitors to PiratePalooza.com will now be able to leave messages for the Captain via a handy Google Voice widget in the site’s sidebar, directly below an advertisement for the Captain’s rPhone™ (as featured in the infamous YouTube video “Dairy Wench”).

In what has been described as “the most confrontational press conference since Steve Jobs threw a camera at an intern” Captain Drew rambled for 35 minutes before relieving himself off the front of the stage into a trendy messenger bag carried by one of the reporters. In a fleeting moment of clarity the Captain explained:

“Well I heard tell that there be this incredible [unintelligible] net thing… and that this here Gooble bunch think that they know how to make money from this net [unintelligible] so I aims to get my [expletive] hands on their Gooble booty before any other deck sprawlers lay wind of it. Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble…..”

The Captain’s speech went on for another 8 minutes before he curled up underneath the lectern and went to sleep.

A technology reporter from WIRED magazine was heard to say “Dudes… don’t expect Gooble to team with Captain Drew anytime soon on [their next product] ‘Google Wave‘… hey, did somebody spill a drink on my bag??”

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BREAKING NEWS – Captain Drew is holding a press conference at PiratePalooza’s corporate headquarters where he will apparently be revealing plans for a hostile takeover of the Georgia Renaissance Festival. Updates provided below in real time, just hit refresh to follow along…

7:25PM
They’re playing Coldplay over the loudspeaker system… large crowd of people… everyone seems to be Continue Reading

It be no small secret that I likes ambling down to the Trader Vic’s on Thursday nights just to hear the Tiki band Tongo Hiti play the sweet, sweet music of the Pacific isles for wandering tourists and lonely conventioneers. If you do make it down there tell Big Mike that Captain Drew sends his regards… but be warned: as the night grows long and the rum begins to dwindle the music begins to change over to something far more sinister…..

I’ve just received breaking news from me pal Foe regarding the status of the 2008 edition of his wildly popular Pirate Party held at Dragon*Con. Last year’s party featured a Virginia Reel, a non-concert by Mr. Voltaire, a costume contest, a dancing Chewboxxa and a raging Fire Marshal… aren’t you sad you missed it?!! Well now’s your chance to learn the poop for the new and improved 2008 version so keep digging!!! Continue Reading

Planning already be under way for the 2008 Pirate Party at Dragon*Con... which be some sort of heathen jamboree what happens in downtown Atlantarrr every Septembarrr (scant weeks before me PiratePalooza™ Pubcrawl). With the help o’ Cap’n Sparrow I crashed into this rowdy congregation of pirates last year and were supremely impressed with the effort what went into it, not to mention the dancin’, the singin’, the rum, the ample corsetry and a wide range of space aliens from back around me own homestar. No wonder that fire marshall feller were so hot to keep it in check, it were a hootenany to be sure! So, if you’re plannin’ to attend this year’s event you need to know that the scurvy seadogs behind the event have erected a web doodle for to keep all of you rogues and privateers apprised of their every move.

I hope to be there again this year, though I plan on drinking much less Old Spice by accident. Pblblblbtt!!!