On Saturday, Septembarrrr 19th, 2009, Captain Drew and his pirate horde descended upon the unsuspecting Port of Decatarrrr for the fifth time in as many years, intent on razing it to the ground… beginning with its supply of rum and ale. THIS be their tale (complete with photographs)….
In the early hours of the afternoon the first wave of invaders infiltrated Fort Twain and gave it a right good thumping before clambering up the Church Street, turning west at Ponce De Leon’s fountain of ale, and marching up toward the Continue Reading
For the third year in a row Captain Drew has gotten the “Look at My Bouncy Corset Virus” on his personal computational device, and for the umpteenth time in the history of computers upon the face of this planet Onyx Consulting has ridded him of that pesky problem ( a problem which salves and ointments could never sooth). But that’s not the only endorsement the Captain will give for Onyx Consulting (which has two Continue Reading
(For those unfamiliar with our tale, the 5th Anniversary PiratePalooza™ T-shirts celebrate the Legend of PiratePalooza, a portion of which has been republished below. These shirts will come in Ocean Depth Black adult T’s and Heart of Darkness Coal for the ladies. All shirts are $15. Limited supplies. Available at the James Joyce during the Pub Sing. Cash only.)
As stormclouds drew tight their net over the port of Decatur, old folks shuttered their doors and withdrew to the relative safety of their cottages. Outside, new mothers scooped up their children and scurried them along the old Church street in anticipation of the gathering tempest. When one young lad wrestled free of his mother’s grip she shouted for her husband’s help. Wasting no time the man snatched the child up short and growled “Listen to your Ma now, get along home!”.
“But Pa,” whined the lad, “why do they all bolt their doors? Why are they a-feared of the storm?”
“It ain’t the weather they be feared of, boy. It be the Palooza. It’s coming for us now son, just as sure as the Devil does come for your soul.”
BREAKING NEWS – Today Captain Drew announced in a press conference at PiratePalooza’s corporate headquarters that he will be teaming with the internet giant Google in a effort to increase awareness of Google’s newest service “Google Voice” and to spur adoption of Captain Drew’s steam-powered rPhone™. Visitors to PiratePalooza.com will now be able to leave messages for the Captain via a handy Google Voice widget in the site’s sidebar, directly below an advertisement for the Captain’s rPhone™ (as featured in the infamous YouTube video “Dairy Wench”).
In what has been described as “the most confrontational press conference since Steve Jobs threw a camera at an intern” Captain Drew rambled for 35 minutes before relieving himself off the front of the stage into a trendy messenger bag carried by one of the reporters. In a fleeting moment of clarity the Captain explained:
“Well I heard tell that there be this incredible [unintelligible] net thing… and that this here Gooble bunch think that they know how to make money from this net [unintelligible] so I aims to get my [expletive] hands on their Gooble booty before any other deck sprawlers lay wind of it. Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble…..”
The Captain’s speech went on for another 8 minutes before he curled up underneath the lectern and went to sleep.
A technology reporter from WIRED magazine was heard to say “Dudes… don’t expect Gooble to team with Captain Drew anytime soon on [their next product] ‘Google Wave‘… hey, did somebody spill a drink on my bag??”
Fresh from his capture by multi-armed robots, Captain Drew reports to us that the Lost Boys unleashed their 3rd Annual Fan Celebration Concert to a standing room only audience this past Saturday at Push Push Theater. This unwieldy concert footage provides a balcony view of their performance of Tommy Makem’s toe-tapping, fiddle-centric song “Rambles of Spring”. For more information on the Lost Boys’ schedule tune to TheLostBoysOnline.com!
This past weekend Wicked Pete Speakeasy caught Captain Drew loitering in New Castle, leading to a nasty game of Salt, Slug, Foot between the two. Fortunately for you, it was captured on magnetic media.
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